King Charles must stop offering Prince Andrew olive branches and evict him instead
Well, it’s time. Time for King Charles to finally show his younger brother the one thing no one in Prince Andrew’s life has ever dared to offer him before: the door.
After all, how long can one man cling onto a 30-room palace like it’s the last lifeboat hanging from the Titanic?
Prince Andrew, squatting in Royal Lodge with all the grace of an unwanted houseguest who has far outstayed his welcome, has become the monarchy’s most embarrassing symbol of privilege and excess.
The solution is simple: Charles must stop offering olive branches and start handing out eviction notices instead. Only then can the royals finally shake off Andrew’s long, controversial shadow.
The royal purse strings have allegedly finally been cut, forcing the Duke of York to maintain his sprawling £30 million estate all by himself. God forbid a man having to pay for his own home!
That means finding funds for the hefty renovations Royal Lodge reportedly needs. One wonders what on earth could be so costly at a reported £400,000 a year – Diamond-studded roof tiles? Gold leaf paint? But somehow, Charles still finds it in his regal heart to keep throwing his brother lifelines, be it in the guise of occasional private allowances or an all-too-generous invitation to appear at public events.
This is where the real issue lies. Cutting Andrew’s allowance is one thing; allowing him to linger at the royal table is another. His continued presence alongside the Firm serves as a stubborn reminder of the monarchy’s ability to be tone-deaf to public opinion.
The Duke of York, draped in his scandal-stained robes, flanked by none other than his ex-wife Sarah Ferguson, is the very definition of “mixed messages.” The two of them are like the ultimate royal hustlers: always hovering around the fringes, waiting for a chance to sidestep into the spotlight – usually with a scandal or two in tow.
Ah, Fergie. The woman whose greatest hits include toe-sucking, cash-for-access, financial meltdowns, and Oprah appearances that could almost make the Sussexes blush. No, the public hasn’t forgotten, Fergie, no matter how many times you’ve been rehabilitated.
Meanwhile, Andrew, in his own corner, has been embroiled in the kind of controversies that make Buckingham Palace issue statements faster than you can say “Epstein.” From his disastrous BBC interview to the looming Amazon series about it all, ‘A Very Royal Scandal’, Andrew’s reputation is a noose around the monarchy’s neck that they can no longer afford to wear.
